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Alan Partridge was No. 7 in the 100 Greatest TV Characters of all time, Channel 4 - 07/05/01 |
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About the show
BBC2 spoof chat show starring Steve Coogan as the inept host Alan Partridge.
After a blast of the Abba hit Knowing Me, Knowing You, Alan Partridge greets viewers and guests with his catchphrase “Aa-haa” (to which the correct response is also “Aa-haa”). Mayhem then ensues as Partridge fumbles for cliches, asks inane questions, rubs his fictitious guests up the wrong way and squabbles with his house band. Each show was beset by calamity, culminating in a stunning bombshell.
Partridge made a name for himself as the sports reporter on Radio Four’s On The Hour and BBC2’s The Day Today. He graduated to a Radio Four chat show, before getting a TV slot. He is a friend of the stars (David Vine, for example).
Alan’s favoured attire is blazer and tie, or a tasteful Pringle jumper.
The studio is a reproduction of Alan's charming Norfolk home where he lives with wife Carol and kids Fernando and Denise.
Music is provided by a house band led by Glenn Ponder (Steve Brown).
Debuted on BBC2 at 10pm on Friday 16 September 1994 |
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Episode 1
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Show One
First Guest: Show-jumper Sue Lewis
Ms. Lewis displays a complete lack of star quality as Alan Struggles to employ his professional skill to force a single interesting sentence from her- anecdotes simply aren't here forte. Her failure to entertain is capped when she refuses to perform a showjumping exercise in the studio, despite Alan offering to have sponges fitted to the horse's hooves to help prevent serious injury.
Second Guest: TV Presenter Keith Hunt
Charismatic entertainer Keith Hunt has recently been drafted-in to present the new slapstick 'This Is Your Life' and his star quality is confirmed when he has Alan's audience answering his catchphrase 'Am I right?' with 'You're not wrong' the moment he enters the studio. However, his private life isn't so successful, when he forgets the birthday of his son from a failed marriage, and Alan is forced to present the youngster with an Alan Partridge tie and blazer-badge combination pack, and a holiday to America for the lad and his mother.
Third Guest: Shona Mc Gough and her band
At first glance it seemed that Ms. Mc Gough's song was perfect for the conservative views of Alan and his show, but when the song descended into a rampaging dirge about murder, Alan was appalled. The band then hijacked the show with unruly behaviour, but Aln, ever the consumate professional, managed to hold the show together.
Fourth Guest: Roger Moore, Hollywood Actor
Unfortunately Roger couldn't make it to the studio, but Alan managed to make brief contact with him via mobile telephone, the content of which was basically 'Roger? Roger? ROGER?!?!?!?!?!?!' The BBC laid-on a full James Bond themed section of the studio, but the previous guests acted in an unbecoming fashion for people in the presence of the great Alan Partridge, and had to be pulled back into line.
House Band: Glenn Ponder and Chalet.
Originally transmitted: 16-09-94 |
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Episode 2
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Show Two
First Guest: Agony Aunt Daniella Forest
Alan was pleased to have a peck on the lips from the agony aunt who was on his show to promote her new book. However, the photos in the book were not of her brother, but in actual fact, were of her- Daniella has once been a man! Dan 'The Man' Forest. Alan felt ill at the thought of having kissed a man, and she was obliged to leave the studio.
Second Guest: Another Alan Partridge
In a new section of the show, Alan meets another person who shares the star's name. This week it was petty officer Alan Partridge who worked for Sealink. Alan was impressed by Alan's bravery in the 'face' of a facial tick.
Third Guest: Tony Le Mesmer
Top hypnotist and magical entertainer Tony Le Mesmer graced Alan's show after the presenter saw him perform live at the London Palladium. Tony proceeded to hypnotize Alan into thinking he was engaging in an extra-marital affair. However even in this hyponotic fantasy world, Alan refused to break the rules of the road by avoiding being caught in flagrente behind the wheel of the car.
Fourth Guests: Gary Barker and Tania Beaumont, Showbiz Couple
The couple appeared on Alan's show to deny rumours that their marriage was on the rocks, and Mr. Barker even displayed his skills of office equipment maintenance from his previous job by fixing Alan's photocopier live. However, after sharing stories of their rock 'n' roll lifestyle, Mr. Barker destroyed one of Alan's famous ties, and the couple then got engaged in argument. Alan officiated over the termination of the marriage live on air. Guide Copyright own
Special Feature: The Wheel Of Death
To prove his show wasn't moribund, Alan was strapped to the Wheel of Death, and had knives thrown at him. In true professional style, Alan kept a stiff upper-lip throughout...almost!
House Band: Glenn Ponder and Debonair.
Originally transmitted: 23-09-94 |
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Episode 3
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Show Three
First Guest: Pop Star Gina Langland
The singing sensation managed to squeeze in a whistlestop visit to the studio, where Alan [presented her with two Victorian Dogs from his big pocket. However, it transpired that the star's collection actually consisted of Victorian DOLLS, and Alan directed that the dogs be taken up the road and let loose. The two then engaged in a stunning ABBA medley, where Alan displayed singing skills no one knew he had.
Second Guest: Lawrence Knowles, Celebrity Publicist
The 'Man They Hate To Love' described to Alan how he would handle delicate celebrity situations. Howver, the tables were turned on Mr. Knowles' exploitation of vulnerability, when his dermatologist Clive Sealey came on the show to describe Lawrence's chronic bodily-hair problem.
Third Guests: The 1936 Berlin Olympics women’s hurdles relay team.
The surviving members of the victorious lady hurdlers team from the Nazi Germany Olympics of 1936 regaled Alan with songs they sang. Alan was banking on them crying, but it transpired that they had already been reunited on a Sky Television show fronted by Dave Lee Travis, 'The Hairy Cornflake.' However, there then ensued an excellent recreation of the race, live in the studio, with a sclaed model of the Berlin Stadium. Alan commentated in true sports-expert style, displaying his skills from his previous occupation as a sports pundit.
Fourth Guests: Hot Pants
The rauncy dance act Alan had been promising throughout the show, and who were to appear with him in a Sprunt soft-drink advertisement, turned out to his horror, to be men. They then joined him in the purpose-built jacuzzi, much to his dismay.
House Band: Glenn Ponder and Ferrari.
Originally transmitted: 30-09-94 |
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Episode 4
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Show Four
First Guest: French Chef Philippe Lambert
The celebrity chef with the ironically untitled restaurant, brought along for Alan, some hors d'oeuvres. Unfortunately, after the host chomped on some of them, it was revealed that the nibbles in fact contained some bull 'glands'.
Second Guest: Alain Perdrix (another Alan Partridge)
As Alan Partridges are a bit thin on the ground in France, Alan had on the show the next-best thing- Alain Perdrix, the French equivilent. He presented the Frenchman with his patent-pending tie and blazer badge combination set, and a rather disturbing painting by a Norwich-based artist of a bulldog with frogs' legs.
Third Guests: <<Cirque Des Clowns>>
Alan sampled some French entertainment by having these famous clown performers on the show. However, much to his disgust, their act descended into filth, and he was forced to intervene. After they continued to cause a nuisance, Alan was required to threaten them with security guard Steve, and have Nina ask them to desist.
Fourth Guest: Yvonne Boyd, Fashion Designer
Having come by boat from the north of England, due to fear of flying, the wacky haute coiture designer displayed some of her wares. Alan was not in the least bit impressed, pointing out that her outfit was made with the distributor cap off a Ford Mondeo and that her models looked as if they had been in an accident, and has 'no dignity.' He then ran a VT of some of his own rather stylish outfits, with a range entitled 'Sports Casual.' Alan was then forced to sack Glenn Ponder, after it was revealed that he had been out the previous night as the Folies Bergere with the guests, but hadn't bothered to invite Alan.
House Band: Glenn Ponder and Savoir Faire.
Originally transmitted: 07-10-94 |
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Episode 5
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Show Five
First Guest: Terry Norton, Sports Promoter
Alan got himself in a spot of bother by bringing up the fact that Terry had once been on trial for garrotting a night club owner in Leicester Square. However, Terry was on the show to announce that he was resurrecting Miss UK, and live on tonight's show, the Norwich heat would be judged.
Second Guest: Another Alan Partridge
Alan had booked onto the show a man sharing his name. However, in the meantime, the other Alan had passed-away. However, being a man of his word, the star presenter still brought Alan onto the show, albeit in a coffin. He presnted the family with a gravestone for the hapless Alan, which unfortunately was dated wrongly. Members of the family also volunteered to participate in the judging of the beauty contest. Alan pulled a few strings to ensure his favourite girl won, but was disappointed that she was already romantically spoken-for.
Third Guests:Charlotte Fraser (Labour), Ronald Biggs (Lib Dem), Adrian Finch (Conservative) and Lt. Col. Kojak Slaphead III of the Bald Brummies Against The Big Footed Conspiracy Party
In a current affairs section of the show, 'A Partridge Over Britain', Alan discussed politics with the candidates for the West Chelifont constuency bye-election, sparked by the death of the sitting MP after choking on a sandwich. However, despite giving the Tory candidate preferential treatment, the section descended into anarchy when the Conservative ended up fighting with the comedy candidate- 'Full Steam Ahead!'.
House Band: Glenn Ponder and Lazarus (not multi-platinum selling international rockstars,The Eagles, after Glenn got an injunction.)
Originally transmitted: 14-10-94 |
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Episode 6
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Show Six
First Guests: The Alan Partridge Playmates
Professional dancers performed onstage with Alan in an excellent choreographed routine, which revealed Alan's dancing skills. Alan then warned that some people had been misusing his rubber face for robbing the NatWest, Sycamore Road, Corby, and stated that his face was designed as a leisure accessory.
Second Guests: Scott and Dean Mc Clain, Child Actors
The pint-sized child Hollywood stars chatted about their thoughts for the future, and about their forthcoming movie. They offered Alan a part, and after explaining that he could get Nick Owen to fill in for him at a sales-conference for Nabisco at the Birmingham Metropole, he said he could take part. However, it was revealed to be a joke, although Alan claimed that it was he who started the joke. He presented them with a toy Batmobile, and complained about having his bat-and-ball stolen by Steve Mc Coombe when he was a child- 'Where is the justice in that?!?'
Third Guests: Bridie Mc Mahon and Wanda Harvey, TV Presenters
The following week, Alan's show was to be replaced by a 24 week long series entitled 'Off The Straight And Narrow.' Alan wasn't too impressed when they suggested it meant their show was four times as good as his. Alan then proceeded to list a catalogue of nicknames he and the lads in the office has invented for ladies who 'swung the other way.'
Fourth Guests: Joe Beazley and Cheeky Monkey
After seeing Joe 12 years previously at a Hoseasons holiday camp, he went backstage to promise him a big-break. However, nerves got to Joe and he fumbled his jokes so badly, that Alan had to interevene to allow him to leave the stage with some dignity. Cheeky Monkey was unceremoniously thrown in the corner.
Fourth Guest- Raconteur And Bon Viveur, Forbes Mc Allister
The restaurant critic for 'Spectator' magazine came on the show to display the personal effects of Lord Byron, bought at auction for the sole purpose of infuriating his arch-enemy Michael Winner. However, whilst examining Byron's duelling pistols, Alan inadvertantly discharged one, shooting Forbes straight through the heart, killing him instantly. The consumate professional he is, Alan kept the show rolling, with the Balmoral Highland Pipers serenading the studio and Alan inviting people to come along to the Texas Homecare which he was opening in Manchester. At the end of the show, he was escorted off by the police.
Originally transmitted: 21-10-94 |
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X-Mas Special
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Knowing Me, Knowing Yule
The Christmas Special, Alan's chance at returning to big-time TV after shooting one of his guests dead in his previous series, was set in a mock-up studio based on his own house, with various people situated around the place enjoying Christmas treats.
First Guest: Tony Hayers, Chief Commissioning Editor of BBC Television
Alan tried just a bit too hard to coax the Chief into giving him a second series, but we were treated to a VT of a day in the life of Alan Partridge, which showed him in Norwich, and getting late-night access to an electrical store on account of his celebrity status, to avoid the general public. To perhpas influence Tony, he ran a tape of himself delivering second-hand toys to sick children in Norwich in his Rover Vitesse fastback.
Second Guests: Gordon and Liz Heron, Golfing Couple
This inspiring story was about Gordon, who had been paralyzed after being struck by lightning at the 18th hole in the Colgate Cup, becoming the caddy for his wife Liz, who two years later, won the cup herself. Wheelchair access was prevented at the Strand Theatre to enable the wheelchair-bound Gordon to enter the studio, by borrowing their ramps, but Alan persevered to have him on the show, despite the fact that there was a fire extinguisher under his chair in case the hapless Gordon went up in flames.
Third Guest: Fanny Thomas, Drag Chef
The comedy chef with speech laced with innuendo, began to tire eventually on Alan, until he was threatened by Peter, the man behind the character.
Alan's Big Cracker
In a world record attempt, Alan tried to break the world's biggest cracker, which contained a kidney dialysis machine. Unfortunately, the man with the girl's name at White City Pyrotechnics hadn't rigged the cracker up properly, and the attempt failed after the cracker burst into flames, requring the kidney machine to be returned to the manufacturers, instead of winging its way to a hospital.
The Centrepiece Of The Show
Alan attempted to stage a live choreographed rendition of the 'Twelve Days of Christmas'. However, no one bothered to remove the smouldering christmas cracker, and the spectacle had to be abandoned, with extras hanging from the ceiling by harnesses. Tension was mounting, and culminated with Alan punching Gordon Heron, and the more disasterously, his boss Tony hayers, with a Christmas turkey. The Chief promised that Alan would 'never, NEVER work in television again,' at which point Alan punched him again. The show closed with Mich Hucknall performing 'Ding-dong Merrily On High' and Alan walking about in a daze.
House Band: Glenn Ponder and boyfriend with Jazz Synthesizer.
Music: provided by a house band led by Glenn Ponder (Steve Brown).
Debuted: 1995 Christmas special.
Originally transmitted: 29-12-95 |
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