Tony Ferrino - "Bigamy at Christmas" Peace on Earth, Good will to all men, Jesus is born in Bethlehem. But think of the man who marries two wives. He's in a pickle when Christmas arrives. Once there was a time everything was fine, A wife and two kids, though I've found, That life is to live, I got so much to give, But there ain't enough of me to go round, And round, and round. Bigamy at Christmas, what am I to do? Spend it with the family? I can't - I've got two! Bigamy at Christmas, I'm in a jam! Turkey with Emily or pudding with Pam? A puppy for Jean, a dog for Maxine, Nintendos for Pablo and Steve. A Christmas shopping list for a bigamist Is a very very very long one indeed! Bigamy at Christmas, what am I to do? Spend it with the family? I can't - I've got two! Bigamy at Christmas, I tell you the truth, I also married Natalie, Suzanne, Jill and Ruth. Ha Ha Ha - I joke, of course Two is quite enough... Come, sing along Bigamy at Christmas, what am I to do? Spend it with the family? I can't - I've got two! Bigamy at Christmas, what am I to do? Spend it with the family? I can't - I've got two! OK everybody - open your presents! Oh! My Little Pony for Jean! And Pablo's got Mortal Kombat! And oven gloves for Mummy! And for me? Oh, just what I wanted! Soap on a rope! Remember that Bigamy is illegal! Merry Christmas!